Infinite Rebirth. Infinite Death.
Photoshop CS2 and Corel Painter9

This was a "dream: that I had three weeks ago when I was sick.

I went to nap around 6 o'clock at night.  My entire body was aching, and I have just took two midterms.  Both my mind and body were dried out.  I lay in bed with my covers on, and soon enough I passed out.

I woke up to this pitch black room.  I was in the same position as I went to bed in.  My body continued to ache (just as it had ached before I was asleep).  My shoulders felt like it was going to dis-attach from me.  At some point, I asked somebody to stop the pain.

A voice answered, "If you wish to escape from this pain, you have to give up three parts of your body.  You will then die, but then reborn.  After your rebirth, your pain will disappear."

I thought about it.  Since I had the choice to give which part of my body, I have decided to exchange body parts that I didn't need, and offered three emotions: anger, frustrated, and sadness.  The voice ripped it off my body, and then I lost track of what happened.  I suppose I died at point.

Then I woke up to my dream again, but I was still in the pitch black room.  I frowned a little bit to see if my emotion of "frustrated" is still with me--and surprising enough, it was still with me.  I thought I was lucky, because in exchange for a painless dream, I did not give away any of my body parts.

Soon enough, the body ache returned.  I thought the pain was an illusion, so I kept it in to myself.


But about a good while (felt like an hour), the pain in my shoulders worsen.  I wanted to unscrew my shoulders and leave them to rot.  Before I even asked, the voice talked to me again.

"If you wish to escape from this pain, you have to give up three parts of your body.  You will then die, but then reborn.  After your rebirth, your pain will disappear."

It was the same lines from before.  With much pain on my arms and shoulder, I was eager to give away what I exchanged last time.  Then, I thought that the reason the pain reappeared was because I was not daring enough.  Perhaps, three emotions for all the body ache seemed to little.  So I offered my left arm, and two other body parts.  I lost all of my senses after that.

Then I woke up, just to returned to the same room.  My left arm was with me again.  Instead of rejoicing, I was worried that my three body parts did not satisfied the voice, and the pain will return again.

As expected, the body ached settled once again in my body.  This time, the level of painfulness increased.  The voice reappeared to ask me the same question.  At this point, I realize I had to woke up from this dream.

I did.  I was laying on my bed with my covers still on.  My head was sweating, but my feet were icy.  My shoulder pain felt worst, my head was still dizzy.  I took a drink of water, and waved hi to my roommate. Then I return to the bed, hoping that I'd fall asleep.

I did.
And I woke up to the same dream as before.  Same pitch black room.  Same voice.  Same question.


My mind wondered, "Perhaps, this is a guessing game.  My pain will only disappear if I guessed which three parts of my body the voice want."  I took a gamble and gave away three random part of my body.  I died again.



Just to reborn to the same place.



And the voice asked the same question.  I took another gamble, and died.



And I woke up at the same place.


This process continued for a little while, before I realize each time I "die," my body pain increase.  So I told myself not to be tempted by the voice again.

Slowly, my shoulders weighted heavier.  I ignored that.
Then my teeth had this strange feeling, as if they were squeezed.  I ignored that.
My stomach felt as if somebody was continuously punching it.  I ignored that.


A good hour later, I surrendered to the voice, and gave away three body parts; however, this time I had a plan in mind.
I knew I cannot escape the "dying" part, but, what if, I can control where I wake up to?

I jerked myself up before i completely lost all of my senses.  I was back to my reality again.
But my body ache worsen. It hurt to even move my shoulder and arm.  I figured the quickest way to end this was to drug myself.  So I got some pain killers, and passed out on my bed again.

To my dismay
I have returned to the same dream again.
In the same black room,
the very same voice,
asked me the very same question, "If you wish to escape from this pain, you have to give up three parts of your body.  You will then die, but then reborn.  After your rebirth, your pain will disappear."


I thought I was going to kill someone.  I told the voice I was going to bare with the pain.  I thought if I took painkillers in m real life, it will also affect my dream.


It didn't.  My body was begging to die.

Once again, I ejected myself from the dream.  After I was certain I was back to the reality, I force myself to sleep again.  I did this several times within three hours.



To my horror,
I would return to the same dream every time.
"If you wish to escape from this pain, you have to give up three parts of your body.  You will then die, but then reborn.  After your rebirth, your pain will disappear."
I was never going to get out.


My boyfriend came to visit around 11pm.  I didn't know whether that concluded my nightmare or not.
Then the next day, I got really sick right before my third midterm.

At least I am better now..

You should only fall in love with someone whom you can laugh, dance, and get lost with.

Then can people be super close, but not in love?

I wonder.

My last two weeks agenda was as follows:

cough = 1;
for t=00-00-00: 0.5 : 23-59-59    %start at 12am, increment every 0.5 hours, end loop at 11:59:59pm
     cough = cough*2;
     return cough;
end

oh oh I can do MATLAB programming!  In case (my limited) readers didn't want to search up "Matlab for dummies," that code translated into: every half and hour my coughing worsen... Yep... I've been like this for the past two weeks.


And now, my doom is waiting for me: Math midterm tomorrow 11am.

Woot.  Since I haven't been to class/paid attention to what I did in my homework, I am just awaiting for doom to arrive right now.  WHEE!



I went to see Phantom of the Opera with boyfriend this weekend.  It was fun, they had really good scenery and special effects.  I would suggest it to any Broadway newbies.  My boyfriend, who forgot that he actually saw Broadway shows before, loved it to pieces.  Yes, a big dude loved it to pieces.  Later at the weekend I caught him searching for the soundtrack. heh heh heh.

Anyway, for Vocaloid junkies who also happen to like Phantom of Opera:

If you didn't like robots singing, at least the chibi Miku and ...whathisface is cute. Yes yes?



Yayyy~ I should really start to study now.
I have a dream to share soon... after I get a picture done... which means 7 days later... -.- gomen

 Story time! :D

Once upon a time there was a Mel-chan, and she is very happy with a sheep call boyfriend.



Okay, enough bullcrap.  Onto the actual dream.

So my boyfriend is actually terrified at things insects that can crawl.  Basically, if there is a worm somewhere, he will start sneezing non-stop.  After a good few years of repetitive reactions to crawling insects, he had developed a sad sad reaction to crawling things.

I mean, wtf, useless.
I never said that.

So a while ago, I was in this place with boyfriend.  We were half cuddling on a white sofa.  Speaking of which, everything in that room is white, except for a few plants and the chairs, which was made out of red wood. For some reason, this part is the most vivid image in the entire dream, though it is not relevent to the dream..  Oh, we were also wearing white clothes.  It looked kinda weird on him, white shirt and plants?  Michael Jackson dejavu??

At some point I think we were playing with food.  Don't quite remember what we were playing with, but I think one of us had red wine... or some sort of wine.  This prove that we are pure genius because red wine + white clothes + white sofa makes the BEST reason for couples to fight.  Now that I look back at it this makes even less sense, since both of us are still underage.  Does my boyfriend have alcohol connections that I am not aware of?  Now I must question him.

As you have guessed, the red wine spilled on my arm.  For some reason my clothes weren't dyed.

But my arm was covered with tiny tiny worms.  And they were moving.
Well more like, they look so drunk that they were just twitching on my arm.

Either way, I was trying to get them off me.

I grabbed the closest glass of water (where did it come from?) and splashed on it.  However, the tiny worms continued to twitch.  To be more accurate, they were twitching, but it seem like they are starting to have more movement freedom than before.  Maybe the myth about cold shower after lots of alcohol is true on worms??  They started to crawl towards my shoulders.

After quickly anaylzing that water didn't worm, I dabbed a bit rubbing alcohol to a cotton (again, where did it come from??) and rubbed it on my worm.  Either the rubing alcohol or the rubbing killed (part of) the worms, as their twitching stopped, and slowly they fell from my arm.  I was relieved.

Except, since they were covered on my entire arm, I had to basically pour the entire bottle of rubbing alcohol on my arm.  I was about to do that, but I realized I was still on the sofa.  I don't know much about rubbing alcohol and leather, but I figure pouring one on top of the other is probably a bad idea.

"Where are you going?" My boyfriend asked innocently.
Crap, I forgot he was still here.  Would you excuse me for being the best girlfriend ever?

He started to moved forward to where I was, and the last time I remember doing...

"GET THE FRUITCAKE AWAY FROM ME!" I yelled, and fell off the sofa.


Then I woke up and was late for classes.  The usual.
The end :)  Hoped you all enjoyed my story <3

I was going to update, but I got lazy.  Well there is one now :DD

I had one of the strangest dream ever today while I was napping at boyfriend's place.  It wasn't a long dream, because according to him I only napped for about an hour-ish (which is consider short nap for me :P).

Story time~

I just finished a final and was tired, so I decided to walk back to my dorm.  On my way I passed by Ackerman, in which there are little stores selling random stuff.  I was tired, but since my final went quite terribly, I decided that I would distract myself.  So I walked by a store, which the lady store keeper was selling black fabric.  It wasn't any "pretty" fabric, but a few yards long black farbic.  I thought that it was about time that I relieve my roommates from my all nighter desk-top light shine nightmare, so I checked it out.  The fabric was on sale for $3.50 per 4 yards of fabric, and I told myself "it's slightly expensive."  wtf super ghetto -_____-

and then I wonder to the next store, which I don't really remember anymore... but it was a men selling.  And whatever he was selling I was probably not interested.

The next store in line was manage was a short (my height?) tanned skilled man.  He has white and unhealthy hair with black/gray patches in it.  Oh, he also had yellow teeth.  And he was selling tings which I also don't recall.. yay for bad memories!!
But there is one thing he said that I do recall, he asked me "Do you want some business?" before he grinned at me.

The last store was taken care by an asian man.  When I approach the store, he suddenly stood up.  I glanced through his stuff, though have no intension to buy anything because of what the other store had on sale.  But then I saw this long scarf.  It was red, white and blue "x" marks on it to form a general pattern.  The center of the scarf was made with smaller x's, while the end of the scarf had larger and nin-uniform x's.  The main thing that caught me was not only the pattern, but also the trim it had on the edge.  That scarf had white-brozen-ish metallic fabric to line the edge of the scarf.  I reall liked the scarf, but I figure it will be really expensive, so I didn't get it then.  I did walked around with it in my hands though.

I went to browse at all the other stuff he have.  He also have this little picture book about a family.  Sadly, I don't remember anything about the story... except that it wasn't sad or happy.

Then I circled around to the other side of his store with my scarf in my hand.  I was distracted a bit too soon, as I saw a poster of something that I wouldn't mind owning.  I vagely remember that it was a calendar with something as the background.  I asked the store clerk about it, and he rolled it up for me while telling that this is a one of a kind piece.

I didn't want to purchase it, but since he rolled it up already, I figure I should get it.  So I asked for the price, and it was $6.  I went through my wallet to check for the $6, and I finally got it after quite some search.  I gave him the cash, and he gave me the calender/poster.

But he also took the scarf away from me.  I didn't understand why, because I still have $10 in my pocket.  Was that item not for sale?
He answered, "too expensive for you.  More then $7."

Just then, the lady from the first store suddenly packed her stuff really quickly and ran.  I asked the store clerk again, "$7?"
He said, "$7. $8.  Same thing."

I didn't really understand, but then he started packing.  So I walked away from the little stores and back towards Ackerman (away from my dorm).  The tanned seller looked at me and grinned.

I saw my boyfriend, and a friend ninja.  So I went to greet him.  I don't know why but both of them suddenly looked at my rolled up poster and ask me if there was a mouse inside.  I don't understand either.  I still don't.
They start laughing, "is it a louse?  It is a mouse?"

I left my backpack on the ground next to the bruin bear.  Ninja left his too--but instead of the usual black one.  His was a pimping PURPLEE LEATHER bag.  It wasn't just that, it was also a SUPER SHINY bag.  If you need reference material, think about this kind of material...

On a bag.

In addition, on his bag is a tampon size key chain of Dark Vaderr in GOLD.   So intead of the usual black background figure, we have gold background and black inking for accents of eyes and different body parts, complete with a red light saver.

Ninja friend + pimping shiny purple bag + pimping gold Vader.
I think I lost my mind.
(another way to image: Sasuke emo self + purple bag + gold key chains)

The guy with tanned skin and yellow teeth sat next to the pimping bag.  He asked, again, "Do you want some business?" Then he took out his dried, dirty (has a homeless people's feel to it) hand and went for Ninja's bag.  In which, I tired to kick him by saying "NUOOOOO pick pocketing!!"

My kick, no thanks to my boyfriend who was hugging me, completely missed.

Suddenly, my boyfriend also noticed the pick pocket-er.  So he yelled, "NO PICK POCKETING HEREEE."
So, to resolve the problem, he picked up my stuff and ran.

But the thing was... it was Ninja's bag that was being pick pocketed... not mine... OTZ
Furthermore, he left without me.

The creepy pick pickpot guy asked me once again, "Do you want business?"

Then I woke up,
Thank god.




Goal for winter
Try out new tea :D
Organize computer.
...for now.



Later~

Wahhhh livejournal!  Long time no see~

Recently I've been watching Skip Beat the anime..  Well there is nothing too special about the anime.  Thus far, I thought they could have done a better job oncoloring, but then again it follows the guide lines / orginality of the manga pretty well.  I must say, I quite like their ending song :D  I will introduce it the next time I have a mixtape entry :)  Look forward to it!

I need to do some shopping.  My life is lacking curiosity to discover.
Though I did find these..
   
Red for the win!  Anyway, these are some jewelery charms that I found at Esty. I wanted to get them to make my friends in high school earrings.  I am feeling quite motivated to do that, rather than my physics exam.. unfortunately.. ;____;

If I ever get any results with the jewerly, I'd probably display them like a musemum gallery.  Just to keep you guys heads up.

During the past weekend, I had a little field trip with boyfriend.  We went to Glendale Galleria.  If you live around the LA area and you haven't seen how cute that little outlet mall is, you should :D  For other UCLA students who wanted to go there, this is the bus route I took (heh, too cheap to own a car in UCLA.  Parking spots are expensives yo): departing from Westwood & Wilshire blvd, you take the Rapid 720 Eastbound until you've reach 6th and Main.  When you get off, walk along the main street (but do not cross), the next bus you need to take is Metro 92.  This part is going to feel like forever and ever and ever because you will go through some pretty deserted (or the lack of stores) area.. You will know when to get off--there is a block or two or really really nice residents/hotels that just sticks out in the middle of this deserted area: that's Glendale! :D  As for return trip, you MUST remember that downtown LA have mostly "one way" roads, so instead of going to 6th & Main, head towards 5th & Main for the westbound bus.

Anyway, I was happy that I get to drag boyfriend to random super girly stores for fun.  I am pretty sure he got tired of me after a while..
Me:  Let's go to this store, I want to check out their earring collections
Him: But you don't have ear holes... and you are allergic to most metals
Me: *puppy eyes*
Let just say I won some battles that day.  Okay I'll stop.  But then I bought him to Teavana.  Their tea blends are just so heavenly and wonderful.  I've never had such a godly blend of chai.  Haha actually I am pretty sure their tea are classified as fusion... but if that's what fusion is all about, I'm all for it!  I had to forcefully drag boyfriend out of his addiction to that store *sigh sigh*  But the employee there was really nice.  I wish I've gotten her name.. she deserves some recognition... tsk stupid UCLA front desk people who do their nails during their work hours @#$!$%!#$^

I guess tea leaves are going onto my lust list, neh?  <3 <3  But I wish that their website teach people which tea leaves are good to blend together.  As a poor college student, I have limited income (for my case, no income whatsoever).  So economically I would LOVEEE to get several tea leaves that I can blend in multiple ways.  Hmm I wish they have a chart like that.  Maybe that have it already but I just can't read today -____-

And then at night, I found one of my favorite butter cookies since I was little: ROYAL DANSK. So awesome!!

I am getting my own can when I have time at the Rite Aid.  Seriously, Rite Aid around our school have the most unexpected things in it.  Maybe I should put it in my list of stores that I need to check out every other week to make sure I don't miss any good deals.
They also have Ferrero Rocher on sale when I was there.  That place need some props xDDD

Which reminded me... I really should invest in one of those pack & roll carts (also known as go-carts) so I can start carrying stack of drinks back to my room without losing an arm.  Should I invest my money one the foamy plastic ones, or the grandmother looking metal ones?  Sigh sigh.

Lastly, I drew something after failing a midterm in Physics :<  perhaps this is why I fail... ouchie

Charlie the Kitty-cat :3
Fly high with kitty ears.  Do not underestimate.

I introduce you: the creepy eye series.  The concept itself reminded me of The Bratz... EW?  I just have a sudden addiction to draw them.  Save me?

Should really attempt CEE homework D:  Ewww.

ps, this picture is REALLY adorable.